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How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

topic posted Sun, January 10, 2010 - 9:18 PM by  m
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Dear all, I've recently fall for a Cancer Man born on 28 June. We've recently met in an alumni gathering and he approached me and said he remembered me though I've no recall. We've chatted online for a few times; he seemed very interested in me at the beginning but then would suddenly logged off and disappeared for days. I'm a Capricorn and am usually very reserved; but I've taken the courage to ask him out for dinner. He is a super busy man, but agree to meet me. He was very gallant and courteous but did not seem to be particularly attracted to me (or so I think/ fear). I'm interested in him but do not know how to proceed. Please please help.
posted by:
m
offline m
Birmingham
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    Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

    Sun, January 10, 2010 - 10:59 PM
    I wonder if anyone ever had a succesful or satisfying relationship with someone who does not communicate. Someone who leaves you guessing. It seems to me that if a man is interested in a second date, he will not hesitate and ask straight away. If he does not ask straight away, he will run the risk of loosing you to some other guy in the meanwhile. Obviously, your cancer doesn't really care if some other guy might come in and take you away from him. Being super busy is no excuse for not communicating. It only takes a few seconds to ask for a second date. Leaving a lady guessing is bad behaviour - well, that's my opinion. I don't think it really matters what sign his sun is in. This guy is bad news. Sorry m, but I think you deserve better. This guy has no manners.
  • Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

    Mon, January 11, 2010 - 10:50 AM
    I would say DON'T chase him...Cancer or not. You have made it very clear that you are interested by inviting him to dinner. There is nothing more you need to do. A man who is interested in dating you will come to you, instead of the other way around. Chasing someone only makes him run faster.
  • DEE
    DEE
    offline 9

    Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

    Mon, January 11, 2010 - 12:32 PM
    gender roles aside, a cancer does not come directly at you, and they are famous for not doing so. a cancer courtship has been described as a long, sideways dance. try the cancer tribes for more information.
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      Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

      Mon, January 11, 2010 - 1:11 PM
      I'm a cancer woman, I'm naturally flirtatious and dive straight in, but I have a lot of Gemini in my chart. I'm married and will never want anyone else though. I had a relationship with a cancer man a few years ago. He was a HARD shell to crack. He didn't tell me he loved me until we were together for a year, even after that he was very cold and distant and I felt that he was never fully committed to our relationship. I didn't feel important to him at all, but when we broke up he went crazy! Years before that I briefly dated a cancerian guy and he was so clingy he drove me insane and I ended it quickly. Can you give us more information about this guy's other placements? If you go to astro.com you can do a chart there. The Moon, venus, rising and mars etc will be able to tell us more.
      • Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

        Mon, January 11, 2010 - 8:49 PM
        You cannot chase a Cancer. Successfully. Yhe best you can do is let him get to know YOU. And let him pursuit YOU.

        If he is interested..there is almost no way to get rid of him. He will subtly begin to shop at your grocery store, frequent your gas station, attend your church, work out at your gym... your fav rest...till every where you turn, there he is.

        If he is *not* interested, however, he will let you chase him for the attention and you do not want to go down that road.
        It is long and exhausting and in the end, very lonely.

        So be his friend and show him what an awsome person you are and leave the rest up to him.

        Cancers are very tenacious in getting what they want and once he has set his sights on you, watch out!

        My grandmother put it ike this "A boy chases a girl, til she catches him." (not a type-o)

        Good luck!
      • Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

        Mon, January 11, 2010 - 11:26 PM
        I have the same conflict. I dated one Cancer who was like psych sensitive and clingy and now I am in love with the Hot/Cold Cancer? WTF? I hate them if I didnt think they were so freakin hot.... I definitely think the first "clingy" cancer had a cancer moon although I am not sure...just read alot about that type. This new cancer seems to have some air signs floating around....peculiar,yet very intriguing. I guess that's why I can leave him alone...Scorpio and our damn obsessions!
        • Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

          Tue, January 12, 2010 - 2:03 AM
          "I have the same conflict. I dated one Cancer who was like psych sensitive and clingy and now I am in love with the Hot/Cold Cancer? WTF?"

          Pluto girl, the difference between them is that one cared for you and the other does not or 'not-yet'. He is still trying to make up his mind. And you have to give him room and time to do that.

          With my Scorpio in my own chart, I am all too aware of the affects this man can have on you. OMFG.
          There really is nothing hotter that a Cancer when he has his sh*t together.

          Stil, resist that urge to pour you soul into him. If you really want him, he has to be the agressor.

          That does not mean any kind of game playing, but let him come to you. Old fashion-style.

          This is the Cancer dance. In his world everything-including timing- is on HIS watch.

          in my experience anyway...
        • S
          S
          offline 0

          Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

          Mon, September 20, 2010 - 6:18 PM
          Yeah, Scorpio girl here who has never found a man so hot (cancer guy). I am like most of you afraid of scaring him off...and have lots of passion and caring for him at different times...just very hard because I feel rejected sometimes when I don't hear from him, and it hurts me. I have a cancer moon, so maybe I'm a little in my shell sometimes too. I just hate wondering if I'll here from again or if he is even being honest when he says he is busy. I don't want someone to be so busy as to not make me important.
  • m
    m
    offline 0

    Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

    Tue, January 12, 2010 - 9:26 PM
    Thanks every one for your advice. I don't exactly know his other placements and maybe I'll try to find out later. But I think you are all wise and right. Show him what I truely am and see if it works out. The only problem is I worry I don't have the chance -- we have no common social circle and we aren't colleagues etc. Let's just leave it to the stars and see if there's any attraction between us. THANKS again to all your help.
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      Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

      Tue, January 12, 2010 - 10:34 PM
      Ok, you have no common social circle. But he DOES have a memory. He knows you are interested. And he knows where to find you, right? If a man wants you, he will make sure you know he does. He never leaves you guessing. Wish you all the best.
      • Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

        Sun, May 16, 2010 - 3:37 AM
        As Oneinmotion said, there's no use of "chasing" Cancer if he doesn't feel attracted to you. I know this very well, because I am Cancer myself.
        If I don't feel anything about a girl, she can dance naked in front of me and I wont react, but if I am interested, I will start the chase and I won't stop until I get it done.

        Other thing to watch out for when involved in Cancer-relationship, you have to give it a time. I understand that you are Capricorn, which can be a good thing, you have some similarities and yet you are two different type of a people. Capricorn's are usually little distant and cold, so Cancer can "break the ice" and lighten you up a little, while your steady Capricorn nature can give Cancer what it wants - strong determinate partner. Both of the signs are jealous, but yet both of them are very loyal, so jealousy shouldn't be a problem. Problem can arise if Capricorn is too cold and distant, so Cancer might feel insecure and look for exit.

        as for your Cancer man... things could work out, but I won't lie to you, it's gonna be hard. You should take it slowly and not force anything (Capricorn can be forceful, but I am sure you can handle that one out, since Caps have amazing discipline) . If you force too much, you will scare your Cancer and he will run away. Let him to know you as a person and don't lie - Cancer can sense a lie and usually it ends before it starts if you lie to him\her.

        for the simple talk, you should pick topics that are interesting to him, but try not to get anything personal at the beginning until he knows you better. Talk about art, movies, music, theaters, love (in general)... If he is married\divorced and has children, children are always good thing to go (all Cancer have parental instinct, no matter if they are man or woman) . Just don't get jealous if your Cancer starts talking about his past relationship or someone connected to his past that he loved. Cancer love to talk about it, but this doesn't necessary mean that feel anything about that person anymore, it's just that to them - past and a memory (either good or bad).

        to sum it all up... He remembered you, he came to you at first. You moved to fast and ask him out, which scared him a little bit. It's not a bad thing, if he feels something about you, it's actually a good thing - you indirectly told him you're interested and he WILL remember that, just give it a little time for things to go their natural way...

        if you'd like something else, feel free to PM me.
        • Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

          Sun, October 7, 2012 - 4:50 PM
          help me please! lol
          but i hate these feelings cause im with someone else, someone who deserves me more than this cancer guy. im a Taurus doll but im not stubborn, im a homebuddy and like romanticism, i like beauty & what not but i like this cancer's personality-not just his looks (he can shave and i know i'll still be attracted to him) i cant help liking him, i can i accept everything about him, his "flaws" and defects dont bother me. i liked him more then anyother guy and i hate myself for doing this to my boyfriend.
  • Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

    Tue, September 21, 2010 - 7:12 AM
    I am a cancer sun cancer moon male

    To be honest if we don't want someone we don't want them no matter how beautiful they are. Believe me I have been there they have to meld
    well with our personality, our moods, our feelings, and if we sense even the slightest weakness in these areas. We often withdraw as a capricorn it sounds like that will be rather difficult for you. Partially because you stand on the opposite end of the zodiac from us. This may prove in your favor since sometimes opposites attract, but more often than not they don't. But if we don't want you we make it quiet clear and from the looks of this guy he doesn't want you. Partially cause one most cancer men, but not all wont ask a woman out on the first date. We prefer to be chased first, but after the first date if you have managed to entrance us. We will do the work of seeing you again its sounds to me like he is sadly uninterested better luck next time.
  • Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

    Tue, March 29, 2011 - 8:15 AM
    I am a capricorn interested in a cancer myself. Cancers are probably by far the most difficult sign to deal with. I love cancers, I get along with them well, but boy are they hard to catch! I too, have fallen for a cancer. When we started talking he came to me opened up did his magic and boom made me go crazy for him. At first I was a little resistant, I dont like to open up right away. Cancer was there everyday wanting to get to know me we became close fast. Then when he got me right he wanted (knowing I like him back) he began to step back, become resistant, and now disappears at time. I could not understand this action at first, I actually got upset thinking he didnt like me anymore. Thats not the case, it is actually their nature to disappear and come back. As a capricorn this trait drives me nuts, also part of my sign we have this tendenacy to want to know NOW, want to know how he feels NOW, want to talk about things NOW. If you do not want to chase your cancer away, dont smuther him. Sadly, they need time, A LOT of time and space. Like a crab, they do need to be alone at times. Their moods can throw us capricorns off. One day be so happy and want to be with us 24/7 the next minute they could be sad and not say a single word. Now I feel like I'm the one chasing him and hes no where to be found. It is tiring and frustrating. Just know if you truly want him, you got your work cut out for you.
  • Re: How to chase a Cancer Man? Please help

    Sun, October 7, 2012 - 4:37 PM
    I am a Taurus girl and i fell head over heals for this cancer guy, he is never going to ask me out. i have a boyfriend but did not really get over this cancer guy. why? when i am friendly guys fall for me (the ones i friendzoned but i give them chances so they can get out of the friendzone) and anyway when i wanna attract a guy who doesnt already like me nothing works. I seem to date fast because everytime i like a guy enough to ask him out my friends interfere and set me up with him. im tired of directing the relationship, i wanna feel like a guy wants to be with me and participate instead of having me direct everything all the time.
    how do i aproach this cancer guy whom i already dated?? (one date, i was too busy to ask for a second date when he decided to end it)